On Friday night at The Gatehouse holiday party, I was presented with the Volunteer of the Year award. It’s the second time since I started volunteering six years ago I’ve received this honour, and I want to name that plainly, not to elevate myself, but to be honest about the moment.
What I felt was simple and clear: gratitude, humility, and a deep sense of privilege to serve this community.
There was no discomfort in receiving the award, no urge to deflect it or downplay it. At The Gatehouse, we often talk about the importance of learning how to receive compliments and appreciation cleanly, without batting them away or shrinking ourselves in the process. This moment was simply an opportunity to practice what I believe and what I teach.
I was also honoured to share this recognition with Zada, who was acknowledged separately for her own steady and meaningful service. Anyone who knows The Gatehouse knows that no one does this work alone. Recognition may land on an individual, but it reflects collective effort, shared care, and countless unseen moments of showing up.
As I reflected on the evening, I thought about how many men struggle to receive appreciation. Not because they are unworthy of it, but because somewhere along the way they learned that humility meant staying quiet, staying useful, or staying invisible. Many men confuse humility with disappearing. They give, they support, they facilitate, they hold space, but when appreciation comes their way, they instinctively step back instead of letting it land.
There’s another way.
You can serve without erasing yourself. You can be acknowledged without inflating your ego. You can receive thanks without shrinking.
For me, this award didn’t change how I see myself or the work I do. It simply affirmed something I already know to be true: that this work matters, and so does the community behind it. Being thanked without shrinking is something I believe in, something I teach, and something I practice. Friday night was another opportunity to live that truth.
I’m grateful to The Gatehouse community for the trust, the shared purpose, and the quiet courage that shows up week after week. It’s an honour to walk alongside people who do this work with honesty, care, and heart.
